Are you crying for no reason? Do you need to lose some weight and feel bad because you find it easier to empty the fridge into your mouth? Do people try to help you and that makes you sad? You probably have the First World problem – depression!
Being diagnosed depressed is fucking ridiculous. It’s not hard to be depressed. Seriously, go to NHS online right now and look at the symptoms of depression. Fucking hell, I’m depressed! I’m like the switch on a lonely woman’s vibrator. Butt seriously, I don’t understand how normal people just become depressed. After writing my first little “I hate you” introduction to the world of Harry Peat (still no views after 10 minutes – what the fuck is wrong with you people?!) I decided to have a read of some other shit people on this site write about. I came across something about depression and how this girl (assuming it’s a girl because fuck you I didn’t even check) had a great boss and a wonderful mentor and great university achievments and a nice life but she just couldn’t let all these oppertunities make her successful because she’s depressed. She lost weight and was happy, but then got depressed again and crashed her car because she didn’t eat for six days (fucking ridiculous). After reading her article (I’m not linking it, it’s quite a depressing read) I felt immediately irritated (a symptom of depression) and had to add to the blog of things that get on my tits almost immediately.
Being depressed in a first world country is like crying when someone gives you a gift. A nice gift that you wanted, not a horse with dental problems. I’d cry if someone gave me that. You live in a place where you don’t have to worry about being bombed, shot, raped, recruited into an army, forced to worship a different God, opressed, evicted from your home, or starving to death on a daily basis. Worse still if you’re privelaged to be in university, getting job offers, earning a six-figure salary, own your own home, don’t have any STD’s, have no serious illnesses, your genitals are attached and are operational, you are not blind (sight is a privelage, as is erectile function), you have your own teeth and you can walk. So if you’re depressed and privelaged, I hate you. And the rest of the world thinks you’re a dick.